Moed Katan 22
Summary of the Daf
If the elder of the house accompanied the bier to the cemetery and arrived
within the first three days, he counts the seven days of mourning together
the other mourners.
If the mourners are not accompanying the bier to the cemetery, as soon as
they turn back at the gates of the city, (I.E., the outer gate), they begin
the mourning period.
If the mourners are still being comforted at the time of his arrival, that
is when R. Shimon holds that even if a mourner arrives on the seventh day,
counts the mourning period together with the other mourners.
It is preferable to hasten bringing the bier to burial unless it is the
funeral of a father or mother.
A mourner has a choice whether to abstain from work during the mourning
period (work that is permitted to a mourner such as commerce). He also has a
whether to bare his shoulder (I.E., to plow).
A mourner may take a haircut and attend a wedding after 30 days. If a parent
passed away, the mourner may not take a haircut until his friends yell at
him (I.E., rebuke him),
and may not attend a wedding until after 12 months.
A mourner rips only his outer clothing the length of one handbreadth. If a
parent passed away, the mourner rips even the underclothing and he must
rip until he reveals his heart.
A mourner has a choice whether to rip at the collar or not, and he may
stitch up the rip after seven days and repair it properly after thirty days.
parent passed away the mourner may not rip by the collar and may never
repair it properly.
A mourner has a choice whether to rip by hand or using a utensil. If a
parent passed the mourner must rip by hand.
The mourner has a choice whether to insert his hands inside his clothing in
order to tear or to rip from the outside. If a parent or the Nasi passes
the mourner must rip from the outside.
If a Torah scholar passes away his Beis Midrash is vacated; if the head of
the Beis Din dies all the Batei Midrash in the city are vacated; and if the
dies all of the Batei Midrash everywhere are vacated.
The Gemara says that if the mourners do not plan on accompanying the
deceased, they start the mourning period as soon as they turn back at the
the city. The Ramban says that is only true if the bier is being taken to a
different city. Since the bier is given over to the people that are dealing
with the burial, the mourners have put it out of their minds and thus the
mourning period starts from that time. But if it is being taken to a
outside the city, since it is not being taken far away, the mourners still
have the burial in their minds. Therefore, they do not start the mourning
until the people that accompany the bier return and tell them that the
deceased has been buried.
A mourner may go to a wedding after thirty days, but if one is mourning a
parent it is forbidden until after twelve months. Even if it is a leap year,
is permitted after twelve months. If a person has an obligation to host a
social meal, he may do so after seven days. But if he is not obligated to do
so, he must wait until after thirty days. If he is mourning a parent, he may
not attend a social meal even if he has an obligation to do so.
The fact that it is permitted to go to a wedding after twelve months implies
that the mourning period is completed after twelve months even if it is a
year. Those people who continue their mourning even in the thirteenth month
are doing so without any source and for no apparent reason. (Taz)