I’m supposed to be studying but this was too good to pass up without commenting. A Catholic charity in Britain says it believes couples should pray together
before engaging in sex — and to help them along, it has composed
a special prayer for the occasion, which it has entitled “Prayer Before Making Love”.
The special prayer asks God “to place within us love that truly gives, tenderness that truly unites, self-offering that tells the truth and does not deceive,
forgiveness that truly receives, loving physical union that welcomes.”
“Open our hearts to you, to each other and to the goodness of your will,” it adds. “Cover our poverty in the richness of your mercy and forgiveness. Clothe
us in true dignity and take to yourself our shared aspirations, for your glory, forever and ever.”
Look, I’m all for prayer and everything, but I don’t see this taking off. I could be horribly mistaken, (sarcasm very much intended), but lovemaking isn’t supposed to be one of those activities that gets marked down in one’s daily planner, and clergy definitely do not have a place anything remotely close to this in anyone’s bedroom but their own assuming they’re involved in this sort of thing. And while these men of the cloth aren’t exactly suggesting making sex a scheduled event, they’re coming dangerously close. I haven’t conducted any surveys, (and don’t plan to), but I can’t imagine any couple being detached enough from their anticipated lovemaking to think either of picking up a book and reading a prayer, or calling to mind a prayer they may have memorized and stopping everything they’re doing so they can recite. Sometimes I ask myself who comes up with this stuff, I mean the part about writing prayers like this specifically for publication. Finding this article has definitely been the most humorous part of my day, I hope it brightens someone else’s.